Focused Intention Technique Process—“A tool for creating lasting change in the shortest time possible”.

As each of us expands in our own understanding and consciousness, that growing level of awareness raises the level for everybody on the planet. The trick lies in how to open up to your true identity and inner power so that you can live from the heart without losing your mind, right!?

The Focused Intention Technique process, also known as FIT is a simple technique consisting of questions which take you into your ”feeling body”, the part of you guided by heart centered consciousness. This is where your personal truth strives to harmonize with the divine. When we choose to create feelings of love and compassion in our lives, we can feel this energy radiate from our heart and outward into the world. We feel supported and connected by all that is. Our bodies feel lighter and at peace. When those feelings are not apparent in our life, we know without a doubt that we are out of alignment with heart centeredness. Read More→

In my therapy practise, the work lately seems to be about helping clients release and let go of ‘unfinished business’ from the past; whether it’s an old romance that still niggles away at their psyche, healing from a past trauma, or coming to terms with one’s family-of-origin and learning to reposition oneself in our families as the adult women we are now, rather than reacting like the child we used to be.

For example, one client came to me because she was having trouble trusting the new partner in her life, even though they were getting along and he treated her very well. She couldn’t shake the belief that he would one day discover that she ‘wasn’t worthy’ of him and trade her in for a prettier, younger version. I hear this story a lot for some reason- as an unbiased observer, it always strikes me as ludicrous because the woman sitting before me is inevitably bright, beautiful, and lovely with everything going for her. But hey, I’ve been there myself so no judgment on my end. Read More→

As I write this, I am in North West London sitting in a Starbucks tapping away on my travel laptop (can you say TINY- actually gives my hands cramps). How odd to be drinking the same drink I order in Canadian Starbucks on a regular basis but to be in another country. Not sure how I feel about this eerie sense that I could be anywhere- the ‘gift’ of globalization in the form of franchised chains which deliver the same beverages, food, (and even music in the background around) the globe. Anyhow, I digress…the point of this article is to examine my slight identity crisis which I’m sure many of you dear readers can relate to seeing that most of us are a mix of many different cultures which while providing great diversity, can sometimes also make us wonder where we belong.
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Although I’m not quite sure how it happened, I turned 39 this year.  This came as a huge shock as I remember my 20’s so vividly- as if they were yesterday. It seems to me that once you hit 20, the process of ageing accelerates exponentially until you’ve barely gotten used to the decade you’re currently in and no sooner-whoosh! – It disappears in a flash of lightening and you’re propelled (or catapulted as it often feels) into the next decade kicking and screaming all the way.

Even with all of the blessings that have come in my 30’s (i.e., material comfort, wisdom, grounding, and a great marriage), I am completely bewildered at how I could possibly be turning 40 on my next birthday and don’t exactly relish the thought. Ideally, I’d love to be able to magically mix my 20’s looks with my 30’s wisdom and stability and stay 30 forever, but as we all know, this is an impossibility (maybe not for long due to how advanced science is these days…) Read More→

Isn’t it incredible how fear can nearly paralyze us and it isn’t until we really hit a major crisis that we see how strong we are?  Strength comes from many different things.  Mainly from going through a lot of negative experiences and through the process of overcoming these experiences we gain more strength and learn how to be tough, be strong, and plow through.

However, a lot of us still have fear to take the next step in life that is needed to go in the direction that we truly want to go in.  This does not involve the type of strength that appears suddenly when hit with crisis.  Most of us don’t take the steps necessary to go for our dreams because we think we are not going to be strong enough to take on what it involves to go there.  Or we are afraid of failure?  Or success? What if?  Attached to outcomes…we all want things to turn out exactly the way we see them…but what if they don’t?  Do we have the strength to handle that outcome?  Do we have the strength to make it through if it is harder than we thought?  What if people around me think I am crazy?  What if my spouse doesn’t like me anymore because I am doing things differently?  What if I can’t pay my bills?  What if I take time away from taking care of everyone else?  What if I appear selfish?  Am I being selfish?

First of all, stop and think of all of the things that will be positive about the changes you will make.  Write them down.  What if it does create everything you have always wanted?  What if your journey takes you in a different direction than anticipated, yet it is still better than where you are now.  What if your new experiences create such positive energy and excitement despite the difficulties that come with change?  What if you find that you are an even more incredible person than you ever thought you were capable of becoming?  What if you do have the strength to handle anything that comes your way?  What if people turned around after you started your journey and noticed how incredible your life is becoming because you took a risk, believed in yourself, and no matter what, the process made you stronger, created positive  change and now your friends and family are coming to you for advice on how to improve their lives?  YEAH??? Well, I can tell you that most likely the positive things that I just mentioned will occur.  Now are you scared?   If you only knew what you truly are capable of…you would never fear again.

More than any other time of year, around the Holidays, we tend think about what we can do to better the lives others.  An ongoing mantra that sounds beautiful is “Peace on Earth, goodwill towards men!”  While that is a great thing if it could happen, peace on Earth sounds like kind of a tall order doesn’t it?  I tried to think about it.  If one were tasked with making this a reality where would they start?  At first it was so overwhelming I couldn’t imagine what to do.  Like a child tasked with cleaning their messy room, it seemed like it would be a lot easier to crawl under the covers and just hope it happened on its own.  Then it hit me, like any big goal, it starts with a smaller goal and works outward.  Okay, well that helps a little but who or what should be the catalyst for such a beginning. Well, that suddenly became clear…the peace for the world starts with our peace in the world… and that peace starts within each one of us.  Now we’re on to something but again, where do we start within ourselves is the next question.
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I’m sure you’re thinking, “What the heck is defining my beauty?” and “How in the world do I do that?!”  It probably conjures up thoughts of creating your own personal style or fashion statement.  Maybe you can start wearing a funky hat or rippy jeans. It must be your hair right?

I want to start by defining your beauty from the inside.   So let’s get to the definition, are you ready?

Webster’s dictionary, defines beauty as; the quality or aggregate of qualities in a person or thing that gives pleasure to the senses or pleasurably exalts the mind or spirit. Wow!  We’ve been obsessed with physical beauty for thousands of years and there it was right there in the dictionary, ‘pleasurably exalts the mind or spirit!’
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There’s a part of all of us that we hide from the world. Some parts we’re aware that we hide, and some are so far buried that we don’t even know what we’re hiding anymore. During my own growth as a person, a soul, a coach, and a teacher, I have come face to face with more of my “stuff” in the year 2009 than I have in my whole life. It’s been amazing what I’ve uncovered, but I tell ya – it’s not always been a “roses and rainbows” process.

During the last few weeks of 2009, I started to feel more and more like it’s become more painful to hide and repress who I am and how I feel than to express it. When I first started to feel this way, it came with a nice hot side dish of attitude: Hey buddy, if you don’t like me *blank* you! Now, of course I realized that I didn’t want to stay there, but I still sensed there was something healthy on the horizon. After a lifetime of seeking approval, I finally felt little need for it. I had a confidence and a love for myself that I had never had before.
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Stacey Kaminski had a scary dream the other night. She saw a big white owl, shrieking and devouring other birds in the forest. She woke up, startled.

For so many of us, that would have been the end of it all. For Kaminski, it was just the beginning.

Kaminski is a dream tender and a doctoral student of depth psychology at the Pacifica Graduate Institute in Santa Barbara. Dream tending is a technique of activating the dream images that visit us and honouring them as embodied entities that are greater than ourselves. Kaminski believes that to understand a dream, you have to enter into a dialogue with the dream image, give it a persona, invite it into your living room, and understand the wisdom inherent in it.

For her, dreams are not merely symbols that need to be analyzed; she calls dreams the language of our souls. Take the scary owl dream.
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Divorce ceremonies and rituals unbind the emotional ties of a relationship in a way impersonal legal paperwork simply cannot possibly address. This unbinding of emotional ties allows individuals and families to move forward with resolve and confidence. (Divorce ceremonies are not to be confused with Divorce Parties, which are often about revenge and covering up resentment.)

Sometimes a couple wishes to symbolically mark their ending with a Divorce Ceremony. But much more often such a ceremony is sought out by a former spouse who is having a difficult time moving on.

If this is you, a Divorce Ceremony will do much more than recognize the hurt your parting has caused. The intentional reflection and planning, along with a meaningful ending ritual such as a Pledge of Release, helps you regain your personal authority. You become the ‘doer’ not the ‘done to’.
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